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The number one asset and resource that anyone has when making a change to their lifestyle, is their decision to do something different. This is never truer than when successfully stopping smoking.

Attempting to stop smoking for the wrong reason is virtually always doomed to fail. One of the wrong reasons might be convenience. What I mean by this is that, you attempt to stop smoking but not because you are necessarily ready or committed to stopping, it is just that a convenient situation has occurred for you. Let me explain...

Let’s say that a friend or partner husband or wife of yours, who is a smoker, makes the suggestion that it would be a good idea to stop together. On the face of it this seems to be a great idea because you can support each other in remaining stopped and there is this nice feeling of doing something together... camaraderie or team spirit you might call it.

Unfortunately, in reality although both participants know they ought to stop smoking at some point in time, on this occasion it usually means that one person is really ready to stop but the other is going along with it because it is convenient or they have got caught up in this being a good idea without giving it too much thought.

After a short period of time, the person who hasn't really made up their mind to stop, will try and persuade or cajole the other person, into just having that one cigarette. If they succeed in persuading the other to have one, they will both fail. It is a kind of collusion to smoke, just as those of us colluded to smoke the very first time when we were young. In fact we did it because our peers did it and we wanted to be part of that crowd... accepted. Here is an example of the same influences happening again.

This is why it is vital to stop smoking for your own good reasons and not to do it out of convenience. The convenience aspect will often come into the equation when someone decides to stop smoking with the help of a hypnotherapist. Let us say the wife has decided to do this. But the wife, although motivated to stop smoking now, will not have had hypnotherapy before and may have some anxiety about it. A way of overcoming that anxiety is to encourage the husband to quit with the aid of hypnosis too. Here again one person is persuading the other to quit and with a particular method, when they haven't really reached their time and decision to quit.

Any hypnotherapist who naturally wants his or her clients to succeed will need to ensure that both husband and wife really do want to stop and have made up their minds that they want to do it right now. This being the case, then doing it together can be a real asset as the sense of doing it with others can strengthen their resolve to stick to their decision.

I certainly emphasise to people who come along in pairs for quit smoking hypnotherapy sessions, whether mates, husband and wife, or partners, that they should be there for each other to keep to their decision to quit smoking for good and not to collude together to smoke.

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Steven A. Harold
Clinical Hypnotherapist
www.hypno-therapist.com